Down and Out

Uh, why do I always feel like this on Fridays? I'm midly depressed, nothing that I'd need my medication for, but just enough to feel "down". It mainly started last night, my hubby diasppointed me, I had a bad dream, and tonight he informed me that we're going to a friend's house for dinner.
I've been doing so good watching what I've been eating and purging those things that I didn't want to effect my body- but still I feel huge today. I'm bloated and "poochy". The last thing that I want to do is get dressed to go out with friends. Yes, I'm excited to have some fun tonight, but I'm more in a mood to just do nothing.

I feel like I'm over thinking my life lately. I have so many things going for me- every one at work loves me and my boss (and my boss' boss) are constantly telling me how great my work is. I've been getting great opportunities at work and they're always "picking" me to do stuff- like having a luncheon with a visiting dignitary, ect. Online, I've finally found an outlet for my ED issues and it's been so great getting to know more people and truely finding out that my problems aren't only my problems and that there are others dealing with the same things.
At the same time though- the one thing I really want I can't get by myself. I want to get pregnant! I want a baby so bad! I've always wanted kids and now I've been married for almost 5 years and I'll be getting out of the military soon, so it's perfect timing. I just don't feel like my husband is as "dedicated" as I am about it. If you've read my earlier posts, you know that my husband and I are about to move back in together after about 8 months of "dating" again. This was MY week, THE week, for us to get pregnant, and he worked so late every day that we couldn't see each other afterward. I know that over-thinking it and stressing myself out will make it harder for me to get pregnant- but things are perfect right now! If we got pregnant now like I want, then our due date will be October 15- a time when there are no holidays that would "over shadow" my kid's birthday's in the future. My b-day is around Mother's Day, my little sister's is around Thanksgiving- and we both know how much it sucks when the days line up and everyone else is celebrating something else on your birthday. Does anyone else get where I'm coming from? Am I just over-thinking it?

Okay, this is long- enough complaining for tonight. I guess I need to go and get ready to go.